Santa Is Putting Christmas On The Blockchain And Saving Billions

So, you think that you know all there is to know about Christmas?

Maybe you string enough lights on your roof to give Clark Griswald a run for his money. Maybe you can identify mistletoe and holly in the wild, chop down your own Christmas tree, and know exactly how many Hallmark Keepsake ornaments they’ve issued since 1973. You can rattle off all of Santa’s reindeer—backwards, starting with Rudolph and ending in Dasher, and know all the words to O’ Tannenbaum. Including all the verses. In German. You own White Christmas—which is indisputably the best Christmas movie ever—on Blu Ray, DVD, VHS, and Betamax (I’ve included a link if you have no idea what that is). And heck, you even make figgy pudding on Christmas Eve.

No doubt about it, you’re a true Christmas fan. But this Christmas, there is so much more than you know about, as Santa straps on today’s hottest new technological advancement: The blockchain.

St. Nicholas, is stepping up his game for Christmas 2017, and if you want to hang onto your crown as the biggest Christmas fan ever, you need to be in the loop.

It’s only to be expected, really, that Santa would need a serious upgrade. He has a lot of running around to do, lots of children to classify as naughty or nice, a lot of chimneys to climb down, and a lot of presents to deliver. And in 2017, he has come across a solution that is bound to make his life a little easier this year.

Before we go any further, we should make clear exactly what it was that sold Santa on blockchain technology. It first came to his attention when Mrs. Claus read about the astounding rise of bitcoin in her morning paper. Santa began reading around the topic (thinking that perhaps the elves could mine some to give to the children) and soon realized that bitcoin was just the beginning. It was the blockchain behind the currency that was the real secret to its success, with companies in the space such as Global Blockchain Technologies Corp. seeing their stock prices soaring (and who we went to for help on the technical aspects of how Blockchain works). This was a company that was not only invested in cryptocurrencies but was acting as an incubator for everything from new anti-corruption voting systems to highly transparent and efficient recording tools. Santa saw its potential immediately, adopting blockchain technology and, as a result, finishing his Christmas preparation earlier than ever before.